Movies & Entertainment Reviews

Transporter Refueled Image101

Will the real TRANSPORTER please stand up!

As a franchise, TRANSPORTER’s best days may be over. I mean, seriously, these flicks are so over-the-top bad, they were good for what they were. In many ways a lot of it is owed to Jason Statham. So refueling them (total pun) can be understood, but a TRANSPORTER flick without the original, stone-faced hero is like sex without cumming. Who wants that?

Meet the new Transporter, ladies and gentleman!

Known to the French Riviera’s criminal underworld as the best driver money can buy, soft-spoken Frank Martin (Ed Skrein) will deliver anything for a price. He abides by three simple rules: no names, no questions and no renegotiations. But the rules go out the window when he is tricked by gorgeous femme-fatale Anna (Loan Chabanol) into driving the getaway car for a brilliant bank robbery. Racing through the streets of Monaco in a state-of-the-art Audi, Frank unwittingly becomes personally entangled in a scheme to bring down Yuri (Yuri Kolokolnikov), the Russian human trafficker who forced Anna into prostitution 15 years ago.

Enticing, right? Eh… Not so much.

Coming off more like an Audi commercial on steroids, a predictable REFUELED defies all cinematic logic. (I know, what movie doesn’t?) But it makes up for it with unique action sequences (one that entails a fight utilizing file cabinets, or a pretty cool moving plane escape), a dull (with the exception of Ray Stevenson) cast, and a cat-and-mouse chase using backdrops of the French Rivera’s most gorgeous locations. Other than that, nothing about it is effective. Empty calorie.

After the first forty-five minutes I just wanted this to be over. Kinda like the feeling when you can’t wait to spit out that piece of gum you’ve been chewing on for a while. 

As a whole, the movie looks beautiful. But beauty isn’t quality. Hell, coming off similar to HITMAN in many ways, at least HITMAN had a bit of a better, structured plot. And that wasn’t the best-of-the-best either. Of course beauty IS in the eye of the beholder, but not much can be expected when an [unofficial] superhero flick like TRANSPORTER is left for the end of the summer. Trying to reignite this flame will be difficult considering its gigantic shoes to fill.


Grade: C- / Genre: Action, Adventure, Reboot / Rated: PG-13 / Run Time: 1:35

Starring: Ed Skrein, Loan Chabanol, Ray Stevenson

Directed by: Camille Delamarre

The Transporter Refuled OneSheet

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